Kenyan Men Can Never Compete With Ugandan Men…Except In The Office

ugandavskenya-menThere is an increased number of Kenyans flowing into Uganda and their men are highly irritating. The level of arrogance and disdain they display is appalling and to be honest we are getting fed of them and ready to kick them out of our peaceful and happy country. Considering the fact that they come to Uganda as laborers they ought to behave themselves and stick to what they are good at (working), as trying to take our Ugandan women is a herculean challenge that they keep failing. In fact as they cannot even handle their own women- as they often chase old white men- is testimony to this.


Ugandan men have a certain panache that no others possess. We are not only gentlemen in the streets but freaks in the sheets and maintaining this balance is very difficult for our Kenyan brothers. Our priority comes in treating our women as queens and providing for them, something Kenyan men can never manage. So when they come to Uganda and act all macho and sophisticated it doesn’t work because of certain traits they lack.

Innate Liars

Kenyan men are chronic liars. They cannot tell the truth to save their life, making them the least trusted people in East Africa. Instead of being honest an open a Kenyan man would rather lie and even when caught still perpetuate the lie. Am glad Ugandan women are now realizing this and have stopped entraining them. A well known ‘shag me’ lie is how they shall take the Ugandan woman back to Kenya on holiday but after tasting her kandahar they disappear. Ugandan men don’t have to lie to get sex…we work for it.

Stingy Bastards

A Kenyan guy will never buy drinks for people. In fact he will sit and drink on his own even if you share the same table. When they take out a Ugandan woman they cannot even pay for a special to pick her up. Such behavior is unacceptable in Uganda as we treat our women as princesses and spoil them. These people shamelessly mistreat our women and must be stopped. If you cannot afford a Ugandan woman then stick to your own who like to drink beer…our princess take wine and other fine drinks.


Romance is the best way to capture a lady. If you treat her right she will melt into your life and do anything and everything for you. Ugandan men are very romantic and that is why you see our women kneel down for us because we treat them right. Kenyan men have failed to get respect from their own women so one wonders how a Ugandan can respect them, especially due to their unromantic disability. I heard that the most romantic thing Kenyan men do is take women out for meat and beer. This is just disgusting and a lack of respect and shall not work with our women at all. They should be ashamed.


This has to be what clearly sets us apart as from what I gather Kenyan men are allergic to foreplay. Preparing a woman for sex is a paramount ritual that Ugandans practice. It I sad that Kenyan women don’t have twin-towers (elongated libia majora) or a pulled clitoris as this would circumvent their men’s bad behaviors. Ugandan men are known to pleasure or women and those from Kenya with our kachabali and Kenyan men can never reach our level…the work they do is only in the office not in the bedroom so let them not waste women’s time.

Communication Etiquette

Women like to feel cared for and special and one of the ways this is shown is how one communicates with them. Sending texts is not one and this is where Kenyan men fail. A call might be more expensive but it touches a lady deeper than a text or social media post. Kenyan men are notorious for texting women and it just doesn’t work as making a call shows that you truly care.

Oversized Dressing

Kenyan men have to be the worst dressed in the world. They wear suits that drown them and torn collar shirts. Clothes say a lot about a person and how they dress screams disappointment! If you cannot even dress yourself how do you expect to score a woman? They also wear some of the most outrageous colour combinations and even wear jackets when it’s blazing hot…this puts off many women and adds vantage to Ugandan men because we not only know how to dress but also perfom.

Limited Stamina

This is from a group of Ugandan women who have had the misfortune of dating and bedding Kenyan men, apparently Kenyan men don’t have enough stamina to satisfy our women. It is very sad when a lady complains of bad sex because there are many worthy suppliers who can do the job effectively and efficiently. It is no surprise that Kenyan women chase Ugandan men because we not only possess the stamina but the skills as well. Maybe they ought not to work so hard but focus on their women as anyone can do your job but only you should do your woman.

So basically Ugandan men are on top of their game (pun intended) and Kenyan men ought to just stick to office matters. It takes a lot to satisfy Ugandan women and they clearly don’t have what it takes, moreover to satisfy their own women. If you cannot manage at home then surely away is going to be even trickier.

Vibe Weekly

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