Revenge, it is said, is best served cold. That is exactly what a man did to his dead mother-in-law a week ago in Gakambura village in Embu East County.
The middle-aged man, only identified as Gatwe, in drunken stupor, shocked villagers when he decided to settle scores with his late mother-in-law in style; he lowered his trousers, whipped out his ‘willy’ and directed jets of urine into her grave, leaving everyone outraged.
According to locals, the drunk man had been complaining to his friends at drinking dens about his overbearing mother-in-law.
He is said to have expressed his hate for the old woman to his friends, claiming he dislikes her because of her strictness and that she controls his family.
When the old woman passed on, the wayward man is said to have sold two goats and deposited the proceeds to a local brewer, where he ‘celebrated’ the death by drinking himself silly — daily till her burial.
During the day of the burial, instead of participating in the communal digging of the grave, the man’s only contribution is said to have come in as free booze to those doing the job.
When one of the grave diggers questioned his generosity and the abundant beer he was offering, Gatwe laid bare the long-held hatred he had for his mother-in-law.
“Drink my good friend, ours is not a house of hunger. I am little by little telling the good angels above a big thank you for hearing my prayer by taking away this woman and reinstating my rule of law as the head of this family,” said Gatua, rather coldly at the shock of grave diggers and other present members of his family.
It was in that moment that Gatua lost his mind and began saying unsavory things about the deceased. “Make the grave even deeper, so that she is deep and far from us and doesn’t hear a thing including the last trumpet, he said.
However, it was at that juncture that the family elders intervened, stopped the merry, and led Gatwe away.
Shock and embarrassment
During burial time, all had been well, complete with a church service up until Gatwe arrived from the watering hole.
He staggered to the grave site, and apart from him singing off key at the top of his voice, there was nothing else to betray his ill intentions.
He insisted that he must be one of the pall bearers, a wish he was granted. Unknown to many, he wanted to have a chance to position himself strategically so as to serve his mother-in-law the icy revenge by giving her what some called a ‘warm send-off’.
And just after the priest said the last ‘ashes to ashes’ prayer and it was time to fill the grave, poop hit the fun with Gatwe peeing in the grave, leaving everyone in shock and embarrassment. Efforts to stop him hit a snag because when anyone tried to restrain him, he directed the pee in their direction.
It was after he ran out of urine that villagers restrained and whisked him away. Those present condemned the act, and called for Gatwe’s cleansing, lest the entire village is visited by bad omen from the deceased curse.